Mama Mia Greek Pizza and the Myth we call Perfection

Use what talent you possess:

the woods would be very silent if no birds sang

except those that sang best. 

 

I'm having one of those "less than perfect" days. Nothing is particularly wrong, I just can't seem to get something right. I had HIGH hopes of offering up a wonderful meal to my family and to you tonight, but for the second time in a row it was less than perfect. Which got me thinking about the lenses that we see each other through.

In my old neighborhood I had a neighbor who was the epitome of perfect. Her hair was perfect, her make-up was perfect, her clothes were perfect, her house was always tidy and ready for guests, she hosted fun luncheons and even figured out how to balance all of that and stay in shape. I was the polar opposite of her. I rarely did anything more than a ponytail with my hair, makeup was a luxury that was just out of my grasp, my clothes covered my body, nothing more nothing less (I was just grateful for the days that I could escape, unscathed, by the onslaught of baby food that was being hurled at me) and my house, though it was tidy, it was never guest ready. If someone stopped by unannounced I would either pretend I wasn't home or holler at them through the door that they would have to wait for a second while I quickly ran through the offending room shoving everything out of sight.

...oh, and that other thing. Let's just say that the scale and I are not on speaking terms at the moment.

I envied her and wondered how she kept it all together. I tried to be like her. Some days I felt like I was doing a decent job, but longevity has never been my strong suit. I can sprint for a few minutes but stretch the time out and I fall on my face. I could handle it if I just stumbled a little, brushed myself off and continued on my way, but the truth is I do the kind of face plant that is played over and over on "Wipeout". You know the ones when the poor person kicks themselves in their own head. Yeah, that would be me. So I lay there, watching as everyone else tramples over me and passes me by and soon I am worse off than I was before I even started the race. I wondered why she could do it so effortlessly and I always fumbled.

Then, it happened. It was just a minor thing, but for me it was a pivotal moment when I realized that we are all human and the lens of perfectionism that I was viewing her through was made completely by me. After that I started to notice when things weren't exactly perfect. Not in a judgemental type of way, but in a "Yeah sistah, I know it's been a hard day. I've got your back. Welcome to the club" kind of way.

So this was my offering to my family last week. I was doing an assignment for Bountiful Baskets where we were all planning a "Pizza and a Movie Night". I knew that I wanted to try my hand at a zucchini crust with a bunch of fun Greek flavors running through it. Oh, and we were going to watch "Mama Mia" because what else would you watch while eating a DELICIOUS Greek pizza?
 

 

That BEAUTIFUL zucchini crust was seasoned with cardamom and dill. Up on top we had grilled red onions, garlic and rotisserie chicken, tomatoes, olives, mozzarella and feta cheese. Just before taking the picture I drizzled it with a homemade tatziki sauce. It smelled AMAZING!

 

After the picture was taken, we sliced the pizza up and got ready for a tongue tickling treat that was sure to satisfy. What we found was a soggy pizza that's crust was more like a paste. The toppings were good and luckily I have a very adventurous family who complimented me on the things that tasted good instead of focusing on this epic failure.

 

But I wasn't about to get my butt kicked by a pizza. So I tried again, this time with less gusto and with the effort that I could muster for the night. I hesitate to even post this as a recipe, but I think that it is a fun "jumping off" point. It is the tiny brush strokes that you can use to design your own masterpiece. Just imagine the possibilities. Plus, we all need those easy nights where we are able to just throw something together. This fits the bill. And when the pizza is ready you can snuggle up with your family and enjoy "Mama Mia" too and we can enjoy our imperfections together. 

 

 

Mama Mia Greek Pizza

 

1 prepared pizza crust

1 Tbsp olive oil

2 breasts from a rotisserie chicken

1 onion diced (red is preferred but you go with what you have some days)

1 clove garlic

1/2 tsp cardamom

1/2 tsp dill

3 small Roma tomatoes diced

1 4 oz can diced black olives (not pictured)

1 c mozzarella cheese

1/2 c feta cheese

 

Preheat oven to 450. Saute onion, garlic and chicken until onion is translucent. Top pizza crust with chicken mixture, tomatoes, olives and mozzarella. Sprinkle with cardamom and dill. Bake as per package instructions. My crust suggested 8-10 minutes or until crust is cooked to desired crispness. Turn oven off and top with feta cheese. Let it sit in cooling oven for 3-5 minutes.

 

Mango Coconut Banana Bread (Vata balancing)

"Our thoughts and feelings have a chemical effect on our bodies. Stress, repressed emotions, depression, anxiety, lives being lived half-assed – all have profound effects on our wellbeing.

Even our fears, hurts and sufferings need to be digested, along with our last meal.

Being truly nourished has just as much to do with our thoughts, feelings, beliefs and experiences as it does with what we are feeding ourselves on a daily basis."

                                                                                                                   

                                                                                                                  -Corona via nurturepod.com

 

Todays quote was much longer than any other quote that I've posted so far, but I loved the way she expressed so much of what I have been feeling. Today's recipe is brought to you by my loose understanding of Ayurveda. I have read through the lists of flavors that help balance the different doshas and the thing that surprises me time and again is that when I truly listen to what my body is telling me I end up selecting foods that are part of the list to help balance my dosha. It shouldn't surprise me, but it does.

 

I thought about appearing "all knowing" and listing all of the flavors that balance the vata dosha, but that's not where I am at the moment. I am just doing my best to listen to the subtle cues that my body is sending out. You will be happy to know that I am caffeine free again (for the last 12 hours anyway, but it's a start), so that should help.

 

I've learned that winter is the prime season for vata to become imbalanced. Ayurveda says that "like increases like" and "opposites decrease". The vata dosha is characterized by the elements of air and space. Both of which increase in our natural world during the winter through qualities of cold, dry, light, mobile, rough, and subtle. It is not surprising that winters have been hard for me to endure for the last several years. During a time when the vata dosha is easily imbalanced I have also been trying to loose weight, eating light and cold foods instead of the warm and comforting foods that my body wants. The "like increases like" throwing my body into vata imbalance that spirals into depression.   

 

Beyond listening to what my body wants by way of nourishment, I am also trying to do as the quote suggests and truly digest my emotions. It is easier to push those emotions aside, especially the really ugly ones, and just hope that they go away. But scientists are finding that these emotions often have physical repercussions. I think many of us have either read an article or listened to a radio blurb talking about the physical ailments attributed to stress. It isn't hard to imagine that our other emotions create either physical harm or physical healing depending on the emotion.

 

So, today I will allow my emotions a place to express themselves. I wont push away the ugly ones. I will invite them to sit with me, no matter how scary that might be. We will get to know one another and try to come to the reason for their visit. I will love and accept them for what they are trying to teach me. I will digest their lesson and move on, knowing that I didn't try to bury them without giving them a chance to speak. Everything that I experience is for my good.

 

While I am conversing with my emotions, I think I will offer them some of the delicious Mango Coconut Banana Bread that I made yesterday. It has the perfect blend of down to earth goodness that my emotions are in need of. As the days shorten and the earth gets colder I hope you will try some as well. Curl up with a warm slice and a cup of your favorite tea with a splash of milk.

 

 

 

Mango Coconut Banana Bread

 

2 1/2 c flour

2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp nutmeg

2/3 c sugar

1 c sunflower oil

4 eggs, lightly beaten

2 tsp coconut extract

2 tsp lemon juice

2 c diced ripe mango (1 large mango or 2 small)

4 extra ripe bananas, mashed

1/2 c coconut flakes

 

Preheat oven to 350 or 325 if using a convection oven. Sift together flour, baking soda and nutmeg. In a separate bowl combine sugar, sunflower oil, eggs, coconut extract, lemon juice, mango and mashed bananas.

 

Fold dry ingredients into wet ingredients being careful not to over mix. Divide batter between two prepared loaf pans and sprinkle coconut on top. Bake for 50-55 minutes. Check half way through cooking time to ensure that coconut is not becoming too dark. If it is you can cover the pans with foil to prevent any further browning. Make sure that it is cooked through by inserting a clean toothpick into the center of the loaf; if it comes out clean then it is ready.

 

  

M.I.A....oy veh!

“If your compassion does not include yourself,

it is incomplete.”  

                                                         -Buddha
 

So, you've probably noticed that I've been "missing in action". I think I only had one post for all of last week. There have been a couple of contributing factors, but I think the single most contributing factor is that I took a running leap off the wagon. I would like to say I "fell off the wagon". I would like to say that I was doing everything in my power to stay on the wagon. I would like to say that I was being dragged behind the wagon, being battered and bruised by rocks and sage brush and the only logical explanation of why I was no longer "on the wagon" was because I had to free myself from the constant beatings. But truth be told I was quite enjoying my ride on the wagon. Things were looking up. I was feeling better physically and mentally and really felt like I had a handle on what I was doing and then suddenly, out of no where I just decided that one Coke wouldn't hurt.

 

I decided that even though everything was perfect I should take this opportunity to screw things up again. I saw something in the distance that resembled happiness in the form of sweet syrup cascading gently over cool refreshing ice with tiny bubbles that exist only to tickle my taste buds. So instead of sitting nicely on the wagon, knowing that I was discovering the path to true happiness, I opted to scream "Sayonara suckers" and jump off. Right now I am so far from the wagon, that I can barely make out the dust cloud created by the wagon wheels in the distant horizon.

 

The thought of chasing after that wagon is exhausting. But I know that if I want things to "work" in my life I have to let caffeine go. I wish I could find balance with caffeine and use it just on days when I have something pressing to do and no energy to do it, but that goes against everything Ayurveda and it goes against everything that my body knows.

 

So here I go again, making a new commitment to you and to myself that I will let it go. But more than just "let it go", this time I am planning new ways to combat cravings. I have been looking into a type of acupuncture that is called "Tapping" or "EFT". My counselor recommended it when I saw her last winter. The basic idea is that the cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body's energy systems. This disruption can manifest itself in the form of a craving, a sudden change in affect or illness. By tapping on energy meridian points on your body, and focusing on love and self care, you are able to stabilize your energy fields and return to a place of equilibrium.

 

It looks interesting. Honestly, if someone said that the key to constant happiness is to wear your undies on the outside of your clothing I would jump on board so fast you wouldn't even see the transformation. I might look ridiculous in the process, but I will try anything.



 

Today I choose to have compassion for myself. I recognize my limitations and I create a plan to overcome everything that stands in my way. After all, to quote Stuart Smalley from "Saturday Night Live", "I'm good enough. I'm smart enough, and dog on it people like me."



Grilled Peaches a la Mode

Delicious autumn!

My very soul is wedded to it,

and if I were a bird

I would fly about the earth seeking

 the successive autumns.

                                                          –George Eliot

 

With our recent trip to the mountains, and all of the beautiful changing leaves, my stomach couldn't quit thinking of all of the exciting flavors that are about to grace our table. But my heart isn't ready to give up summer quite yet. Tonight, for dessert, I decided to make my heart and my stomach happy with a fun twist on a summer dish that plays up some of my favorite fall elements.

 

Say hello to Grilled Peaches a la Mode. This is the time of year that the peach trees are heavy with sweet, ripe, beautiful fruit just begging to be picked. If you are lucky enough to live close to a farm, you might take this time to pick your own peaches. Or maybe, you have a single peach tree in your yard that supplies an abundance for you and your family. My peaches came to me via Bountiful Baskets. As soon as I got home I tucked them away to preserve them for tonights dessert. Fresh peaches don't stand a chance in our house.

 

 

This was the first time that I've grilled peaches, so it took a bit of guess work and patience. In the end everything came together in a palate pleasing crescendo. I wanted to add fall elements of ginger, cinnamon and pecans but also keep it light, with the summertime freshness of peaches and vanilla ice cream. This was a perfect end to our grilling season by welcoming some of my favorite fall flavors. I hope you enjoy the end result as much as we did!

Grilled Peaches a la Mode

 

4 peaches washed, sliced in half and pitted, skins on

1 tube sugar cookie dough

6 gingersnap cookies

1/4 c pecans

1 quart vanilla ice cream

 

Preheat oven to  350. Crush ginger snaps and pecans in zip lock bag with a mallet or pulse in food processor leaving some bigger chunks. Scoop out sugar cookie dough with 1 inch cookie scoop and smash gingersnap and pecan mixture into each ball. Place on cookie sheet and bake for 10-12 minutes.

 

While cookies are baking heat grill to medium heat and prepare peaches by lightly brushing with olive oil. Place on grill and cook for 2-3 minute and turn. If your peaches are not quite ripe cook for a total of 10-12 minutes. Ripe peaches should take about 5-6 minutes. You will know when your peach is ready when the skin becomes loose and juices begin to appear on the cut side of the peach.

 

Remove from grill. Fill pit with crumbled sugar cookie, top with vanilla ice cream and top with additional sugar cookie crumble and any left over pecan and gingersnap mixture.



Away

In this moment all is well.

I am safe.

There is nothing I have to do & nowhere I have to go.

I relax my body & my mind.

I am grateful for this moment.

 

 

 

 

This was my view this weekend. It was absolutely, blissfully, perfect. I've decided that part of the reason I escape when things become to hectic and life gets to be too much is because it is the one time where I can let go of my constant worries and really enjoy my family. I don't think about the house work, the bills that need to be paid or the things that I am failing at. I let it all go and really focus on and enjoy each of my four little miracles.

 

This weekend was brought to you by thing 1. My oldest child LOVES to fish, almost to the point of obsession. In the past this obsession has been one of the hardest things that I have had to deal with as a mother. Saying that he is a persistent child would be like saying that standing on the sun might be a little too warm to handle. He doesn't take "No" for an answer. Even when I say that I just don't see a way that I can get him to a fishing hole that day, he will retort with a long list of "What ifs". This is something that I don't want to take out of him, but something that is completely and utterly exhausting. Just thinking about his persistence is giving me a mild panic attack. I don't like saying "No" if I can help it, but he has three other siblings who have things that they want to do as well, and though I hate to say it, I can't please everyone.

 

As he has gotten older it has been easier to say yes, which is great for him and even more liberating for me. We live fairly close to three different ponds that are stocked on a regular basis. If I'm not able to take him, he can ride his bike to one of the ponds and fish to his heart's content.

 

Lately though, these little ponds just aren't satisfying him like they used to. So the persistence is back in full force. Now he wants to fish on real lakes or rivers. For the first time these requests aren't so debilitating. In fact, they seem to be exactly what I need.

 

Growing up we went camping almost every weekend. Our time was spent fishing, hiking, catching tadpoles and sitting around the fire telling silly stories and listening to the 8 track. My parents had a sweet case that housed some of the finest 8 tracks around. Our nights were filled with the raspy sound of John Denver, the Oak Ridge Boys and Johnny Cash. That was camping to me.

 

When we first had kids we tried camping a couple of times, but soon realized that it was so much work. We were both going to school full time and working full time and trying to be full time parents. Anything that required more than 50% power was just too much. So in the last 15 years we have only been camping maybe 5 times.

 

This summer we went again. Even though it is a lot of work it is exponentially easier now that our kids are older. It still took a full day to get everything packed up and ready to go, but that same amount of packing would have taken me a day and a half if I were doing it on my own. I made a list of things that I needed the kids to find and I worked on my own little projects to help us on our way. Besides the music, camping for me is all about the food. This time we had our traditional Tinfoil Dinners and popcorn cooked over the fire. We also tried Campfire Eclairs which were a HUGE hit!

 

This weekend thing 1 wanted to go fishing, surprise surprise, and instead of coming up with a list of reasons why we couldn't, I said yes. I'm sure there were things that I could have done around the house, or plans that I could have been making, but I bit my tongue and planned a fun day trip to one of my favorite childhood haunts.

 

The mantra at the top of this post is something that I read regularly and something that has helped me be more fully engaged and aware in the present moment. I have a terrible habit of not always enjoying a moment. I think as moms we are wired to think two to three steps ahead so as to anticipate any catastrophes. Something that is brilliant on one hand and life sucking on the other. You can only enjoy the here and now. Though it is important to plan for the possibilities of the future the experience of this present moment will soon become a memory.

 

I am so glad I said yes. We played in the water, snuggled on the beach, laughed at the silliest things and of course,  the boys went fishing.

 

This was our view coming down the canyon. (see, I told you the leaves were changing)

 

 

In the coming week I am going to share with you my plan to stay happy this winter, because really, it is just around the corner. 



Farewell to Summer

Every leaf speaks bliss

 to me, fluttering from

the autumn tree.

                       -Emily Bronte

Can you feel it? It's happening in minute changes. It isn't really that much colder yet, but I feel fairly confident in saying that we won't see any more 100+ degree days around here this season. I don't know if it is because we become acclimated by the end of summer or if I'm just ready for the season of big baggy sweaters and everything pumpkin, but I was actually a little chilly yesterday. It was still in the mid 80's. But, as the wind tousled my hair I got a faint shiver that ran up my spine and exploded in a full body quiver.

Today my family is saying farewell to summer by going to the water park. I know that we are still weeks away from the "official end of summer", but with the kids in school and, dare I say it with a gasp, the leaves beginning to change in the higher elevations, it feels like it is time.

I've been waiting to break out some new pumpkin recipes because I don't want to be the person who is ready to put up their Christmas decor one week into November. I don't think I can hold out for much longer. Pumpkin Cheesecake and Pumpkin Bread French Toast with Cinnamon Spiked Syrup, even Pumpkin Canolli's are certain to grace our table.  I have plans to make some new fall decorations from some odds and ends I have laying around the house. The kids and I are going to go to the park and scavenge for pine cones for some fun little burlap acorns I have my eye on making and so that I can make a few more of these beauties for winter. (Look for a step by step guide in the coming weeks)

But, with as much as I look forward to fall, winter scares me. I have begged my husband for YEARS to let us live somewhere that has more mild seasons, and by mild seasons I mean no real acknowledgement of winter at all. A couple of weeks ago I promised him that I would do EVERYTHING in my power to stay happy this winter. To which I made him promise that if my best efforts fail we would finally move from Utah. I hope that it doesn't come to this, but I also know I can't last for too much longer.

I don't want to set myself up to fail. I know what it takes to move and I know moving out of state will be just that much harder. I just hope that I have done the "dirty work" to prepare myself mentally for the coming storms. I am going to do my best to create more adventure time outside, maybe even come up with a winter "bucket list" and countdown. Like watching contractions on the monitor, I think that if I have something tangible to measure when the misery will be over, I think I will be able to endure it. I really hope that this winter I THRIVE instead of merely survive.

On the plus side, I do know a few more things about myself that have been a mystery up until this point. So hopefully with this knowledge and the knowledge that winter does eventually fade into a beautifully colorful spring, I can make it. Here's to a depression free winter, I think it's about time! 





Ayurve-DUH the simple version of what Ayurveda means to me

The body, like everything else in life,

is a mirror of your inner thoughts & beliefs.

Every cell responds to every single

thought you think & every word you speak.

I listen to my bodys messages with

love & respect.

 

 

So at the moment I can't claim to be an expert in all things Ayurveda, but I wanted to take some time today to explain my understanding of Ayurveda and how I apply it in my life. As the quote above says I believe, and the ancient sages of Ayurveda knew, that every thought we have, every breath we take, every bit of nutrition we take into our body, everything we watch and everything we listen to has a direct immediate, and most times, lasting affect on our body. You can see this response when someone elicits a "fight or flight" reaction. When your body senses danger it immediately begins rallying the troops to get you out of the dangerous situation. It increases your heart rate, dilates your pupils and decreases your reaction time compared to a restful state. It releases chemicals into your blood stream that helps your body know that it is ready for whatever is coming your way. It also takes this opportunity to slow down your digestion and if you were a woman in labor it might also slow down your progression because your body knows that any time where you may need to fight or flee is no time to have a baby or use the restroom.

 

 

In David Eagleman's "Incognito: The Secret Lives of the Brain", he describes new research that suggests that when we view violence our body believes that it is under attack and will react in much the same way, releasing the same chemical messengers, as someone who is actually in a dangerous situation. They studied monkeys that were eating bananas and monkeys that were simply watching another monkey eat a banana. In both instances the same area of the brain "lit up" with activity. The same could be applied to watching something that brings you joy. How many times have you found yourself smiling at the TV? After an uplifting program, how often have you walked away feeling happier than when you started the program?

 

There is a quote that I have been trying to find for several days. The essence of the quote is that every bite we take sends information to your body. You consume the DNA of what you eat and within that DNA is information that will either nourish and protect your body or hurt it. I will post it here when I find it because it says it so much better than I just described, but the message is still the same.

 

Ayurveda describes three main body types or doshas, Vata, Pitta and Kapha. Knowing what doshas are present in your body will help you decide how to balance your life. The sages suggest particular routines to follow, what diseases or "dis ease" may come into your life if your dosha is not balanced and how to live life in tune with your natural body type. There are several quiz's online to discover your dosha, but the one from the Chopra Center is one of my favorite. Most people aren't just one dosha, but when you find yourself in a state of "dis ease" you should focus on your primary dosha and make sure that it is in balance. Here is the link to the dosha quiz.  http://doshaquiz.chopra.com/ At the end of the quiz you will also get additional information regarding your dosha type.

 

All dosha types benefit from routine, but the amount of sleep needed or optimal "wake up" time varies by dosha. My morning routine, when I am doing EVERYTHING that I know will make me happy, looks something like this:

 

5:00 am Wake up, wash my face, brush my teeth, use the restroom (probably a bit TMI, but Ayurveda talks a LOT about digestion).

 

5:15-5:45 Practice Yoga, salutation to the sun.

 

5:45-6:00 Preform Abhyanga. (Using warm oil, give a quick massage to your entire body. I usually do this in the shower to avoid getting oil everywhere. Vata types should use sesame oil. Pitta should use sunflower or coconut oil. This made me smile because my youngest is pitta through and through. Recently we took her to a doctor for eczema and he said that new research was showing that the use of sunflower oil is really beneficial for eczema. Kapha should use sunflower or mustard oil.) It is a head to toe massage, here is a link to how to perform the massage. http://archive.chopra.com/abhy

 

6:00-6:15 Shower. Ayurveda suggests leaving the oil on throughout the day, but that isn't something that I have been able to do yet.

 

6:15 Wake up the rest of the family and make breakfast. Vata types do well with a warm porridge type breakfasts, again there is a HUGE list of things that will balance the different dosha's, but I have found that if I listen to what my body wants I usually come away with something that is on the list, which always makes me smile.

 

7:30 After the kids are off to school I walk the dog and meditate.

 

Ayurveda suggests a slow walk after eating to aid in digestion. I've found that it also helps elevate and maintain my mood throughout the day. They also suggest a few more elements to build into your morning routine, but I haven't quite figured out how to fit them in and haven't discovered their benefits yet. I'm still learning.

 

This is just the very surface of what Ayurveda is. If you want to learn more I suggest the book "Perfect Health" by Deepak Chopra. It dives into the science behind an Ayurvedic lifestyle and the mind body connection. It also has a pretty complete list of things to bring balance back into your life.

 

I hope you enjoyed a little taste of what my life with Ayurveda looks like. I hope to expand my knowledge and practice of an Ayurvedic lifestyle within the coming months and years. I promise to share anything new that I learn or any tips that I come up with to help our western way of thinking and lifestyle fuse with this eastern way of health.